Sometimes I Feel Like My Arm’s Falling Off by Matthew Milia

Sometimes I feel like my arm's falling off
I've been reaching so long for you
But you're in the place
Where all the addresses erase
And there's nothing that I can do

Just slurp on my stasis
I fell in love with every waitress
From Sylvan Lake to Pontiac
Memorized their makeup and their eyes as they take up
A plate from here into the back

I'm aware that I'm disappearing
It seems to be the natural way

Oh, goddamn

Could you say you've ever been lonely?
Could you say you've ever really been lonely?
Could you say you've ever been lonely?
'Cause I don’t think you have

Sometimes I feel like our old answering machine
With an infinity of nights inside
Choke on the vestiges of soft-spoken messages
From a lifetime that crawled off and died

So I spin like a floodlight
In the sky above so bright
From the nightclub a couple miles from here
Where as kids in the danger
We'd solicit a stranger
To buy us cigarettes and beer

And I'm alone at St. Hugo
When there's nowhere else to go
When there's nothing in the slush to find I'm waiting for my mother
Or the touch of another
In the computer lab inside my mind

But I remember the feeling
Before the ceiling
Buckled under its own weight
I've tasted our fear since
The initial appearance
Of the expiration date

I'm aware I'm being evicted
I used to hold the skeleton key

Oh, goddamn

Could you say you've ever been lonely?
Could you say you've ever really been lonely?
Could you say you've ever been lonely?
'Cause I don’t think you have

Sometimes I feel like my arm's falling off
I've been reaching so long for you

Appears on Alone at St. Hugo